It's all in the way you ask...
Your voice, tone, and the words you use all factor into meaning. Having a little voice recorder running around playing back the words, phrases and expressions that you say daily has made me more sensitive to how I speak and express myself. A somewhat authoritative, mother tone comes out like a bossy, dictator monologue when my little girl expresses herself with other kids. I am a bit embarassed about it because it's me that I am hearing and it's shocking when its in the context of a playground.
I've long realized that I am less tactful, more confrontational and all together unclear with my words. I have to work on it even more than ever.
It's Friday, and I've had a tickle in my throat all day. It's actually killing me and now I'm thinking that it's allergies...but it's the weekend and Ja's home and bathing Courtney. It's all in the way that you ask as I realize while I was washing the dishes. As I am almost done the dishes, I am interrupted by Courtney, naked, standing behind me. She says, " daddy says the bath is taking a long time, he's wondering what is going on". And I say, " oh I'm doing the dishes - sorry" and turn off the tap. She runs upstairs yelling, "yes daddy, momma was doing the dishes - you were right!". And all I can do is smile, because that is Ja. Me, I would have said, "turn off the water", but it's so much nicer that way...and I'm still learning that everyday. I'm so lucky that Ja's here too and Courtney can learn some of these subtle but effective ways of communicating....maybe she'll turn out alright in the end.
Enjoy the weekend!